I’m not proud of this moment. In fact, I cringe when I think about it. There’s no eloquent way to tell this story, in fact I was told not to tell it because it’s ‘irrelevant’. But I disagree. So I’m going to give it a crack.
Pictured with my sister-in-law and my other brother’s girlfriend, having the best time at the South Coast Food & Wine Festival. I’d been very ill on the Thursday night and Friday morning leading up to it, with a flare up of intense migraine, body pain, muscle weakness and nausea. But despite that, I was determined to make the best of my time at this festival that my family and myself had been so looking forward to.
The day started well, with a quick 2 minute drive to Berry Showgrounds. We all piled into my brother’s car, and with 6 of us we had to stuff my poor boyfriend, Aiden in the boot. At 6ft something, it wasn’t easy or comfortable for the poor bugger, but it made for some real giggles for all of us and my favourite memory of the day. The look on three girls’ faces when we opened the boot and Aiden (not realising that there were people behind the car) had his ass out while yelling out “help me!”… Absolutely priceless! (Where’s a laughing emoji when you need one?!)
As the day went by, I genuinely had a great time. I like to think there’s nothing a glass of wine or seven can’t fix, if only temporarily…
Lingering in the back of my mind was the fatigue that was trying to draw my attention to it. Annoying, but bearable at this point. Until we got back to the house…
I could feel it, my body practically screaming at me to rest. That migraine starting up as a pressure building in my head. My irritation building. That’s when it happened.
My drunk brother chewed on one of those Allen’s pineapple lollies and threw it at my boyfriend (who’s lap I was sitting on.) Aiden then proceeded to grab the lolly and wipe his fingers off on my new t-shirt. *Insert gasp here*
Now while that’s pretty gross, it definitely doesn’t warrant a full on hissy fit. As I type I picture Aiden’s confused face (because I basically never go off at him,) and I think of how ‘crazy’ I sounded. “You owe me $24!!!” Yep… *Face palm*
I’m fully aware that sudden mood change is quite common with an oncoming migraine, and that irritation and mood swings are also common with chronic pain, but I wasn’t exactly feeling rational at the time to be able to put that into perspective. Now, however, I do feel just a tad bit silly, to say the least.
However, humour at my reaction aside, I think these changes are important to note in a person suffering from chronic pain. They may need a little understanding at that moment, a little bit of patience. Basically, both their body and mind are done pushing through for the day.
I share this, so that if you’ve experienced something similar, you don’t stress over it. We’ve all been there, chronically ill or not. It’s not crazy, it’s perfectly normal (albeit embarrassing.) Let us bask in our embarrassing reactions, own it, and move on.